Instead I always figured that investments (of time, money, energy) were to be placed in things. Not that I'm saying that I had a superficial upbringing. Far from it! And my siblings will back me up on this, right guys? In fact we were a family that gifted each other with time and attention more than any materialistic objects, and we still do. What I guess I'm trying to say is, we were slightly on the hermit-y side. We didn't get out much and we didn't mind. Well I didn't. At home I had my best friends, books, stimulating discussions/debates/arguments. Out in the world I only found social awkwardness, disappointment when I found I could not for the life of me find any natural talent in any game that has ever been invented in the history of mankind and just general discomfort.
Actually the only things I could ever find wanting at home were more books, perhaps a bike, pretty hairbands and new music. Things.
Henceforth I must've come to the subconcious conclusion that experiences were perhaps an overrated concept. That wisdom and growth and pleasure didn't always come from attempting to experience new, exciting and challenging things. That these things could be read, talked and thought about anyway. And doing this would be so much more efficient anyway and save a lot of disppointment in the long run.
Disturbed by my "child self" yet?
However adulthood has changed my mind. Obviously. Though I still find it a challenge to continuously "come out of my shell" (not too fond of that phrase, reminds me of something an older lady on Coro Street would say), it's something I want to get better at this year. I always feel like living in Auckland, there are always people I know or know of, coming and going and doing things, so many things, wonderful things. I certainly don't plan on being an observer my whole life.
... Hmmmm just reread this post and I'm beginning to just sound sad really lol So let's end this on a positive note! (If there's one thing I like, it's a positive note!). I'm not going to claim to do this for the entire year of 2012, this wouldn't be very realistic. I'll just say that for the next month, I shall try to recognise any opportunities that come up to "put myself out there" (another phrase I'm not particularly keen on but what the hell it gets the message across) and perhaps even try to create the opportunities themselves.
My new mantra:
Experiences not things.