Thursday, 29 March 2012

My Theory on Cyberstalking (not the serious kind)

You ready? It ain't that groundbreaking or clever. Just something I've been thinking about, aided by a significant amount of Matchbox Twenty (yeah, the earlier, depressing stuff) and the loneliness of a quiet, sleeping house.

Most us would have been guilty at some point or another of cyberstalking. Often times it's on facebook. Sometimes it's Twitter. Blogger, Youtube, Tumblr... there are a million avenues. And I can assume that on the most part, we're left feeling a little less... fulfilled... would 'fulfilled' be word? I'll go with it.

So why do we do it?

I think...

I think we do it because the pieces of people's lives that they choose to broadcast are always picture perfect and very carefully selected. And when we see it, we take the face value for more than it's worth and we envy and we justify all the excuses we make for why we aren't doing the things we're meant to be doing, claiming that it's because our lives aren't as good or as easy.

I think that afterwards, we then bandage the situation with the simple conclusion that if we only acquired what the other people had and if we only had looked the way the other people looked then maybe we'd have it as good. Instead of really facing up to what it is that we need and more importantly, what we need to be doing about getting that.

Or is it just me?

Or is it just bed time?

Or do I just need to turned off the damned Matchbox Twenty? lol

Love Donna xx

The Kind of Parent I Want To Be

I want to be the kind of parent that:

- dances with my kids
- instead of yelling, speaks firmly
- teaches my daughter how to respect herself and others
- teaches my daughter the importance of her femininity and taking care of her herself
- practices what she preaches regarding the importance of taking care of oneself
- can joke with my kids
- teaches my kids the boring but necessary things like budgeting
- makes time

To the parents out there, what are some things you hope to God you're getting right? And anyone who hopes to have kids one day... Do you think about the kind of parent you see yourself as being one day?

Monday, 26 March 2012

Fobby Music

Yeah... pretty self explanatory title. As much as I love me some Beatles (classics), Mark Ronson (something I'd probably be able to dance more effectively to) and Lady Gaga (all time faves), lately I've been all about what I like to (affectionately) refer to as Fobby Music. You know, a little bit of raggae, a little bit hip hop, a little bit of dance hall.

I'm gonna put it all down to:
a) my cousin Ruta is who reigning Queen of Fobby Music.
b) the summer that was.
c) getting fobbier with age.

Here some of my favourites:

Roll With Me (remix) - J King & Antonious [my ringtone actually ;)]

Oh My Goodness - Spawnbreezie

Drinking Rum and Redbull - Beenie Man ft. Fambo

I Love My Life - Demarco

Enjoy and happy Monday :)

Thursday, 22 March 2012

TAG: 19 Random Questions

Doing a Youtube tag on a blog even though no one actually tagged me. 'Cause I'm gangs like that. 

1. Where were you born?
Samoa. In the hospital to be exact. You know which one, there ain't a lot of them back home.

2. Were you named after anyone?
According to the stories, I was named after Ritchie Valens' love interest, Donna Ludwig, in the film La Bamba (and I suppose real life girlfriend). Yup, the one he wrote the song for. Apparently my Ma (maternal grandmother) thought she was a sweet girl. My first name Lili was after my paternal grandmother. So yes, my entire name is completely grandma-ed out. Oh and yes, I am known by my middle name. Not sure why. Just one of those things... 

3. When was the last time you cried?
Just today when I was watching the Dr Phil show. Shut up. But honestly I cry all the time. At the very least, daily. 

4. Do you have any children?
Well of course you all know my 2 year-old daughter, Tesia, better known as Nutty :D Would also love to have more in the future. Way in the future. Like, way way in the future. You catch my drift. 

5. If you were another person, would you be friends with yourself?
I'm thinking maybe not... Not so much because there's anything particularly unfriendly about me (or so I like to think) but on the most part, I'm very slow to make friends and tend to stick with the small group of friends that I've had for years. But I'd like to believe yes still... I'm not at all a bad friend to have you know :)

6. Do you own any pets?
Nope. Tend to be very sensitive to flea bites and animal fur so probably not the best move for me. I do like the idea of a pet though... I've always been more a dog person than a cat one though...

7. Do you use sarcasm?
Why never!

8. Would you bungee jump?
Heck yeah! Just so bleeding expensive is all. Once I find myself with the extra cash and a willing friend, I'd love to take the plunge. (Oh snap!) 

9. What's your favorite cereal?
Not really that keen on cereal in general but if I had to choose, I'd probably go for the sugary ones. Fruit Loops, Nutrigrain etc. I don't have them very often though so don't worry. They're way too pricey so Nutty and I generally eat whichever Hubbards muesli's on sale. Not sure if it counts but I loooove porridge. So yeah, I dream of sugary goodness but generally eat boring old muesli.

10. What's your eye colour? 
The standard Samoan dark, dark brown.

11. Scary movies or happy endings?
Don't know that these things are mutually exclusive but I'd probably go the happy endings way over the scary way. Just because I have a shockingly low scare threshold. However this doesn't mean that I'm a strictly happy endings girl... I just a love an all round good, thought provoking film. 

12. Do you have siblings?
Yes. Five sisters (cue gasp) and one brother. We're all extremely different while also being quite similar in some ways like siblings tend to be. Oh and of the seven, I'm smack bam in the middle, so three up, three down. Explains a lot don't it? ;)

13. Computer or TV?
Computer of course! TV is on the computer now so it really wasn't a fair question, was it?

14. What's the first thing you notice about a person?
Pre-talking to them: how they hold themselves i.e - their posture and demeanor and how they seem to be relating to their surroundings... that seem like an unrealistic number of things to notice all at once? Though I really do. Normally, in the first few seconds I tend to class people into either an "at ease" category or "self conscious" category. Not claiming they're always accurate readings, it's just what I do. 'Cause I'm judgey like that.
Post-talking to them: their type of humour. A person's humour always fascinates me initially.

15. What is your favourite smell?
The back of Nutty's neck. Easy.

16. Where is the furthest you've been from home?
I grew up in Samoa and now live in NZ. But I dream of globetrotting. Yes, with my baby :)

17. Do you have any special talents?
None at all. Honestly. But if I could choose one from a kind talent-bestowing genie, I would choose dancing. Any type of dancing. I'd love to able to use my body to express myself in such a physical way. Dancers are AMAZEBALLS!

18. Do you have any hobbies?
Hmmm... Hobbies are still a bit of a foreign concept to me, not having grown up with any notion of it in Samoa... I suppose most girly activities. Sad but true. Shopping, primping, squealing. I love it all!

[With Q.19, I'm meant to make up my own question so here goes...]

19. If you could live in any era and place, what and where would that be?
I'm gonna go for London in the swinging sixties. I basically want to live in the film The Boat That Rocked. PVC coats, rock 'n' roll and Twiggy... does it get any better???

Alrighty so those are all the questions. I urge anyone who finds themselves awake still at one in the morning because they had a moment of complete idiocy and drank coffee in the evening just before bed, to do it! It's actually great fun and I'd love to read you amazing people's answers! xx

Some Youtubers whose videos on this tag I really enjoyed:

Monday, 19 March 2012

Catching Up

My goodness, will you look at this! Beautiful!

Today I wrote, not a letter, but an email to an old friend. One of my oldest friends really. And boy did it feel good. Which got me thinking as to why I'd let months go by without doing so and how social networking sites had a huge part to play in all of this...

Sites like facebook have made it really easy to leave a photo or status comment here and there and have that serve as enough correspondence to sustain a friendship in one's head. But it isn't. Of course it isn't. And deluding yourself (or myself, I should be saying) into thinking so is just lame.

And I'm really only beginning to appreciate this now (late to the party, once again). I'm a single mum (my daughter's father is very supportive, I'm no warrior woman lol) and though life is absolute bliss with my kid (did I mention how in love with my baby I am? My sister teases me about it on a regular basis), it does get a tad lonely adjusting to a phase of your life that doesn't include having your friends around constantly. And for a while I got by on letting social media do all the work for me. This however is just not cutting it anymore. I'm now ready to get serious about "working hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle" as Mary Schmich put it in her legendary column, made famous in the great Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen) by Baz Luhrmann.

Oh and by the way, here it is. I find that I can never get enough of it and probably listen to it at least once every couple of months. Whether I  follow through with this brilliant advice is another thing lol Still it's just so uplifting :)

Pardon all the bracketing and for straying a little towards the end but I felt my point had been made ;)

Happy Monday all. 

Donna xx

Image from here

Friday, 16 March 2012

Body Markings

Today I read a powerful article and watched an even more powerful video. They're basically just about women's bodies, specifically post-baby bodies and how we feel and talk about it as individuals and as a society.

Do read and watch them. Even you men (all 3 of you that stumble across my blog lol). I think we as a society forget what women's bodies actually look like. This is what we look like! And we're beautiful.

Tuesday, 13 March 2012

The Edge...

Do you ever get the feeling that your life's at one of those crucial turning points once again? You could either be excited or scared shitless. Frankly, I'm usually both.

It's like you're at the edge of something... Let's hope it's at the edge of glory.

"Put on your shades cos I'll be dancing the flames tonight, yeah baby"

"Time is tricky. You have whole months, even years, when nothing changes a speck, when you don't go anywhere or do anything or think one new thought. And then you can get hit with a day or an hour, or half a second, when so much happens, it's almost like you are born all over again into some brand-new person you for damn sure never expected to meet."

E.R. Frank

Wednesday, 7 March 2012

Nail Polish Out. It's a thing you know.

Couldn't you just die???

After reading the most hilarious post by Lani, I got to thinking about my own addictions. It didn't take long to identify one. Nail polish. I love the stuff. Fervently. To the point where it's almost not funny. Almost. A little bit of amusement still remains. But only a little.

My love affair with nail polish began a little after I'd left school, when it was still a bit tacky to wear. The early noughties were very much about the conservative nude nails and lips (boring! Soo glad we're over that) but I found myself having fun with $2 Shop colours and having people comment on them. 
Then the nail polish craze hit. And boy oh boy is it as big as ever today. And I love it. I love how fanatic the world has become about nail polish! I love that my obsession is justified and even common!


This still doesn't excuse it. I know how unhealthy, expensive and just plain silly this has become. So... a solution!

A favourite Youtube beauty vlogger did something called a Nail Polish Out last year, a project whereby she only allowed herself to buy 5 (which turned out to be 10 but oh well) polish purchases for the year of 2011. This would be much more practical and doable than just going cold turkey. So I thought I'd steal the idea! I'm going to try to go for 8 polishes at the most, which means that each nail polish purchase would be much more thought out and special.

Wish me luck? 

Monday, 5 March 2012

Au revoir summer

You were barely here and now you're going. If not already gone. Well maybe not today, you've never been any good at making your mind up. I loved you still though.

And now for a favourite car/bus/train song from summer 2011/2012... So dreamy and lazy like my favourite type of summer day...

"Copperheads soar through my gloom. Every time you come over here I... smile"

In happier news, I'm excited about donning my boots again and rocking scarves and the best thing in the whole world: layers! Woop!

Hope you're all having sensational Mondays :)